It seems men are more attracted to the ‘girl-next-door’ look than a ‘perfect’ model or actress according to a new study.

I agree. Watching the semi-naked, plastic dolls on Top of the Pops, gyrating while miming their latest innuendo-laden record is not what I consider the epitome of femininity. There are other words that spring to mind, but I’ll leave it there.

Why then, I wonder, do thousands of British men, unable to attract the girl-next-door, search the planet (well, the usual parts) for a pretty young bride?

In 1991 one of my co-workers in an insurance office in London’s Oxford Street invited all the men to attend a Filipino ‘Friendship’ evening at a hall in Hammersmith where young ladies were looking for potential husbands.

Kevin told us how he had married a Filipino once before. He spent a fortune going over to the country and doing the necessary things to bring her back to Britain as his wife.

He then admitted that after a few months of marriage she went out shopping one day and never returned.

So here he was again, looking for another Filipino bride, but much closer to home this time. Everyone in the office was intrigued, but nobody would go with him. Well, except one bloke: me.

I forget how much the entrance fee was to the hall – £12 rings a bell, although it might have been £15, but there was ‘free’ booze all night, which consisted only of the cheapest cans of lager and bottles of wine, but there was tons of it. I’m not sure if I got my money’s worth, but I made a good attempt.

But no matter how much drink they plied me with (or I plied myself with) I just didn’t really fancy having a Filipino wife. Kevin left without as much as an engagement.

I got the impression that the hall was filled with sad men who should have tried to make more of an effort socialising but had given up and hoped for an instant bride, no questions asked.

The Mail reports of similar shenanigans, “From Russia Without Love” over in Odessa, which is actually in Ukraine, but why let facts get in the way of a good headline?

They report that, according to a local private detective, fewer than 30 per cent of such ‘brides’ are genuine and at least seven out of ten are what he calls ’scammers.’

“Money, not marriage, is the motive.”

How much are we conditioned to desire something that’s not even very desirable?

The beautiful woman in the advert stroking the man’s face after he’s used the Gillette Mark 4 triple blade super-sensor sex-magnet might be attractive superficially, but would she make a good wife?

What if you decide to grow a beard? Will she leave you for a smooth man?

How confusing are the images in the fairytales we learn, the adverts that use sex to sell products, the floozies in the ‘entertainment’ industry, the soft porn in the media and so-called sex ‘education’?

Are we, as a society, chasing the impossible (and worthless) dreams implanted in our psyches when we could be happily married to the girl next door instead?