On today’s episode of “You’ve Been Nannied!”…

bob monkhouse pointing

The King of the Game Shows should have been on the checkout.

I’ve been in a lot of pain the past couple of days and thought I’d better stock up on more painkillers. It’s nothing terminal.

You know how they package them in boxes of just sixteen pills these days? Well, I picked up three packets of different painkillers in the local Morrison’s supermarket this afternoon, including one I hadn’t tried before just in case it is more effective than the ones I am used to, and was told by the young lad at the checkout that I was only allowed to buy two of them, so I had to choose which one to reject.

My protestation that I am an adult was to no avail (if the wrinkles weren’t a dead giveaway).

So, I was presented with a “make your mind up time” in which, after considering my needs, I chose to turn down the own brand ibuprofen, which is the one I haven’t tried before. I was half expecting to be asked, “Is that your final answer?”

The checkout experience started to resemble a cheap game show. I stopped short of asking if I could phone a friend or ask the audience (the people queuing behind me).

If Bob Monkhouse had been on the checkout, he would likely have said, “In Bingo lingo clickety-clicks, it’s time to take your pick of the six.”

Or in this case, perhaps, “Banning Nanny won’t leave you be, it’s time to take your pick of the three.”

It could have been worse. I might have walked away with just Dusty Bin, or BFH.

P.S. It helps if you’re a telly addict over a certain age to understand what I’m going on about.

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4 Responses to On today’s episode of “You’ve Been Nannied!”…

  1. isitfoggy says:

    I remember screw top bottles of 50 or 100 paracetamol if my memory serves me correctly.

    I’ve seen a similar incident to your own at my local Tescos. Husband and wife at checkout trying to buy too many packets of painkillers. Checkout girl says no. Husband and wife try to make 2 transactions – 1 each. Checkout girl says because she’s seen them together she can’t do that either. Husband and wife storm off buying nothing at all.

    If I really wanted to overdose on painkillers I might make the effort to visit more than one pharmacy…

  2. Stewart Cowan says:

    It doesn’t seem long ago I still had a bottle of 50 or 100 aspirins in the cupboard. Shop assistants seem to be willingly accepting their roles as snouts and control freaks. In today’s case, the boy didn’t have a choice, as the computer (or till) said, “No”. I did wonder if I went round the shop again would I be stopped. That’s not paranoia creeping in – I have seen it happen before when someone went round more than once to buy products labelled “maximum of 3 per customer”. I don’t know how many times she had been round buying these Capri Sun specials, but I watched security following her and saying how she had changed jackets in the hope of not being recognised.

  3. They probably don’t mind if you go to more than one shop and try to kill yourself – they just don’t want to be blamed for it.

  4. Stewart Cowan says:

    None of the supermarkets ever stopped me from buying booze when I was killing myself on it. And it must have been obvious at the time.

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